Did you just go through a hard breakup with someone you love so much? Does it feel so embarrassing that you scream to your favorite tune haphazardly?
Have you ever felt like some specific place or smell alone triggered a series of images to appear in your head? Do you find yourself analyzing certain interactions thinking to yourself “Where did I go wrong” or “Why did he/she leave me”?
If your reply to any of these questions were affirmative and you want to find how to overcome breakup then you're on the right page.
We are all humans and we tend to get hurt the most by the ones we love the most but it is highly necessary to know how to overcome a breakup as it can affect an individual greatly if not taken care of.
This guide exists with the singular aim of ensuring that you learn how to overcome breakup. With this, you will make the right calls about your life after a breakup and then recover on time. It is time to discover scientifically-based and easy to follow tips for recovery from a break-up.
Why Does a Breakup Hurt So Much?
A breakup is not only a break in your emotions, it is a break in your head and throughout your body as well. According to scientific research, a broken heart inflicts a similar ache to that which is inflicted by physical injuries or even more.
That is why getting over a breakup is difficult, it is not only psychological, it is physical as well.
You’re also mourning the loss of companionship and joint promise, which results in having some emotional breakdowns which could include sadness, anger, confusion or relief.
The first thing one has to do after a breakup is to find out all that they can about this emotional high and low thing.
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12 Ways on How to Overcome Breakup
Here are 12 possible things you can do to get over someone and get your life back as soon as possible.
1. Allow Yourself to Grieve
The loss is real and it is okay to grieve. “Why didn’t he feel the same way I did?” Scream it out if you have to, write what you feel, or simply share some of your thoughts with someone you know.
Denial of emotions tends to slow down the recovery process. Therefore affirm negative emotions without leading to a judgment of one’s self and accept the fact that the process of healing is gradual.
2. Stop Communicating for a while
After going through a breakup, it's always advisable to stay away from one's ex so as to remain sane and emotionally stable. Though it’s okay to visit their Facebook profile, reply to messages, or call and discuss something that occurred, it's better not to keep in touch as it can start the healing process all over again.
It is also important to understand that psychologists advise a period of “no contact” in order to emotionally distance yourself. It is for this reason that you should instead concentrate on yourself and not be involved in their world.
3. Lean on Your Support System
Ending things can feel really lonely, but it really shouldn’t have to. Always contact friends or relatives who might make you feel better about yourselves.
If you speak to someone who has been there before, they help you to remind yourself that it is possible to heal.
4. Create a New Routine
Breakups disrupt your daily life, especially if you share routines with your ex. Replace old habits with new ones that empower you:
If you want to kill time rather than doing morning walk or practicing yoga, try something new other than the ones you tried with your ex before as no doubt it is possible to see old memories.
Pursue interests that have never been of particular interest before. Building new routines can assist you restore order in your schedule.
5. Avoid Idealizing the Past
Indeed, the glamorous picture of the relationship becomes evident after leaving it, as nobody is ideal in any relationship. Take pen and paper and document the reasons as to why it did not work or how it impacted on you.
I find this exercise useful to emphasize that one does not need to ‘go back’ because this perfectly fits the purpose of keeping one occupied.
6. Focus on Self-Care
It’s about time you stand first in line; you know how others value their health, it is time to do the same. Take care of your body and mind, eat well, feed your body with good foods and not junk or provoke it to look for food by skipping meals.
Exercise the body, any type of exercise will unlock those feel good hormones lifting your spirit.
Rest well, due to breakups, it is quite common that one is able to get some sleep, therefore, it is good to have a sleep schedule that will help you calm down.
7. Limit Social Media Use
As much as social media is helping in times of breakup, one can also get news feeds on things that could seem unhealthy to the heart state of mind after a breakup, especially when staying on their feed or on posts of friends you both share which can just become painful.
Such people should be muted, blocked or unfollowed to build the required pixels. Take this time to do things you cannot do on the Internet or to reflect on yourself or something.
8. Changes to Loss and Perception, Redefine the Situation
Nothing is more biblical than the fact that each relationship is a school to attend and you gain something regardless of whether you pass or fail.
On what exclusive elements you have received regarding valuing stand, boundary and future requirements. Simply change the way you look at it and you may be able to turn the feelings of heartbreaks into a positive change.
9. Seek Professional Help
Actually, there are times that moving on seems too overwhelming to bear alone. Seeking professional advice and guidance could be of much help, counselors can also offer ways of dealing with feelings, ways for rebuilding self-esteem and ways of planning for the future.
Counseling is not a form of frailty, it is an investment which people need to make in their personal health.
10. Practice Gratitude
Gratitude might sound strange, but it helps to transform the loss focus towards abundance of things that are still available.
In your bucket list, write down at least three things that you are grateful for each day. It doesn’t have to be extensive: a sunny day, or a friend who is there for you, is enough.
11. Avoid Rebound Relationships
A rebound relationship doesn't make one feel better, rather it might suddenly engage you to a new lower level in the sight of your lover and it doesn't really help in healing the broken heart.
Allow yourself to heal and to construct a new image for which you do not necessarily need a partner.
12. Visualize Your Future
Each time, you are blinded from seeing what is in store for you after a heartbreak. Take the time to dream about the life you do not want to share with your ex anymore, make a dream board, new aspirations or a wishlist.
These steps are useful in moving your mind from the negative way of thinking about things toward the future.
Breakup Tips
These are some other things that people should be careful of during and after a Breakups
- Brain Chemistry: Breakups change the levels of dopamine and oxytocin in the body – this is why breaking up feels like detoxing.
- Healing isn’t Linear: It means that some days will be tougher to complete than others, and that is fine. They also know that growth is never linear: the road to improvement is never perfectly smooth, and there will be plan B and plan C and so on…
- Time Frames Vary: People get healed in various time and hence the saying: the cut heals but the wound lasts forever. Never look at others in your progress buttons and arrows.
Conclusion
As much as break-ups come and destroy our plans they also help to make way for new formations. This time of people’s lives should definitely be called the time of renewal, as it gives everyone an opportunity to start writing a new chapter in their lives.
It’s important for you to know that you are capable of handling a lot more than what you think you can. That is okay now to feel broken since healing has already begun.
There is nothing ambiguous on the road ahead, however, and with the time and much self-care and self-acceptance, you can find happiness and maybe something even better – a happy future.
